Starts with a shadow crossing my mind
A silence hanging at the wrong time
Heart starts running faster than it should
Turning little worries into something no good
I try to shake it, try to let it pass
But the fear burns quick and the feeling lasts
And when the panic finally lets me go
It leaves behind a fire burning low
It’s the aftershock, baby, not you
Something in my blood I can’t always move through
By the time the fear lets go of my chest
All that’s left is bitterness and unrest
And I hate the way it falls on us
How a small thing turns into too much
Then we’re standing in the wreckage again
Trying to find where the hurt stepped in
You ask me something in an honest tone
But every nerve says I’m on my own
I know your voice, I know your face
But panic puts distance in a familiar place
And I see you walking carefully around me now
Like you’re scared of setting something off somehow
Lord, that breaks me more than anything
Knowing love shouldn’t feel that way
It’s the aftershock, baby, not you
Something in my blood I can’t always move through
By the time the fear lets go of my chest
All that’s left is anger and emptiness
And I don’t want your heart on edge
Don’t want your footsteps second-guessed
You shouldn’t have to read my eyes
Just to make it through the night
I’m sorry before the words come out
Before the hurt spills from my mouth
I can feel it rising like a wave
And I reach for peace, but it slips away
I’m not trying to cut you down
I’m just drowning in the comedown
Somewhere between fear and pride
I lose the part of me that stays kind
You deserve a home, not a storm to survive
Not a love that leaves you terrified
And I’m trying harder than you know
To stop the flood before it overflows
But the adrenaline lingers long after the fear
And I’m still learning how to hold you near
Without turning every worried spark
Into another night in the dark